Dating someone who is not yet divorced
So is it a good idea for my friend to go out with him or should she hold off until his divorce is finalized? But if your friend goes into it with open eyes and knows the risks it could be ok, and she might find after date #1 she would not want to see him again anyway. Of course, not knowing the circumstances behind the divorce clouds ALL of our judgements here, so.....
I'm not sure when that will be but they can and do happen quickly in our state. Personally I wouldn't have him even after his divorce was final.
If your partner initiated the divorce there is usually a honeymoon period when it’s over, but a delayed reaction to the loss is not uncommon.
You may find your divorced partner depressed and avoiding emotional intimacy with you because they are in the throes of coming to terms with what they chose to let go of.
Go to therapy and process your feelings of poor self-worth and feelings of not being lovable.
Once the legalities are done that chapter will be closed in a sense. I would NEVER want to be what seperated a parent from their children.
Do you wonder whether their history is intruding on your new and exciting relationship?
Are you wondering if your lover will leave you and go back to their ex, because their prior family is first and will always be more magnetic than you?
You sabotage your chances of succeeding, because you are afraid that you can’t replace the past.
If you come from a divorced family, you may have unprocessed guilt that acts as a saboteur, making you deny the reality of the divorce – just as you may have wanted to do as a child with your own parent. Above all, discover what you are trying to protect yourself from by ceding what is now your power, back to some defunct relationship that doesn’t exist.